


When Mr. Bigglesworth Gets Upset People Die

by goldenegg31



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), Thor (Movies)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Daemons, Alternate Universe - Fusion, Crack, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-25
Updated: 2017-02-25
Packaged: 2018-09-26 18:21:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 419
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9915200
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/goldenegg31/pseuds/goldenegg31
Summary: Loki learns that all the most menacing Midgardian supervillains have cat daemons.





	

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to [misskusakabe](http://misskusakabe.tumblr.com/) for betaing. Title is from Austin Powers.

Loki sat at the edge of edge of his underground lair and absentmindedly stroked his wildcat daemon Sigyn while plotting S.H.I.E.L.D.’s destruction. Engrossed in his thoughts, he was displeased when he realized the archer he had brainwashed was staring at him.

“Is there a problem?” he asked coldly.

“No problem. You just reminded me of this series of movies...” – Loki gave him an I-don’t-really-care-what-you-have-to-say-but-I’ll-humor-you look – “starring this spy called Bond, James Bond, where the villains all have these white fluffy cat daemons – ”

“White fluffy cats?” Loki was slightly incredulous. “That is considered to be the embodiment of evil on this planet?”

“Er...it’s not quite true in real life. But the villains in James Bond and in a bunch of other movies all have these white cats that they stroke while plotting doom, destruction, devastation, presumably other things that begin with D…”

“Hmmm.”

LATER

After Fury left, Loki sat in the cage S.H.I.E.L.D. had constructed for the green beast and gave the camera his best creepy grin. Sigyn lay curled on the bench next to him, her head in his lap. She wasn’t quite small enough for him to evoke these “Bond villains” in the traditional manner, but he’d make do. Slowly, he ran his hands over her head and back, petting her in his most intimidating fashion.

Truth be told, he was a bit worried that this bit wasn’t working – creepy grins were easy, but he’d never thought to make petting his daemon look scary. On Asgard, being close to your daemon was weak, not a cause for fear. How strange humans were.

ONE YEAR LATER

Thor turned away from Loki, fussing over Jane, who watched Loki nervously. Loki gave her his best totally-reassuring-except-not-really grin (#17 on his list of creepy grins). Sigyn moved closer to him from the usual distance the two kept on Asgard. Keeping one hand on the rudder, he sat, petting Sigyn slowly, doing his best to look like he was plotting something absolutely horrible.

Jane shuddered slightly. Immediately, Thor turned around, looking at Loki suspiciously. The hand that had been petting Sigyn stopped and Loki raised an eyebrow at Thor.  

“What are you plotting?” Thor asked, his hand moving unconsciously to Mjolnir. “Did he do anything, Jane?”

“No, I’m being silly. He was only petting his daemon. It’s just that there’s these spy films and the villains are always petting these cat daemons, but there’s no way he could know about them….”


End file.
